Goodbye's

How do you say goodbye?

So, how do you?  How do you say goodbye?  To your family?  To your friends?  To the cashier at the grocery store?

Ok, come at it from a different angle.  What if you knew the person you were saying goodbye to today, may not be there to say hello to tomorrow.

I am sure many of you have had someone in your life that you said goodbye to, only to have them taken away.  How did it feel knowing that you would never see their smile again, hear their voice, feel their warmth as they told you that they love you?  Were you okay with the way you last told them goodbye?  Or did you take for granted that you would see them again?  That you would be able to hold them in some other way than in your heart.

I got a phone call recently that shook me to the core.  When it started out, my Mother asked if I was alone, or if Kim was home with me.  When I told her that Kim was here, she said "I just wanted to make sure she was there for you, I have something to tell you."  When a call starts like that, you know the news is probably not good, and this case was no exception. 

So I got to thinking, and decided that I am going to try to be much better at saying goodbye to people.  Don't worry, I am not going to gush all over the teller at the bank, and I won't start hugging the guy that bags my groceries, but I will try my best to not take each goodbye for granted.  The only way I think this will really work is if I also try to make sure I spend the time in between the hello and goodbye in a manner that is also fitting.  I recently watched Phil Robertson (the Patriarch of the Duck Dynasty family) speak on a YouTube video.  And he said that he loved me, and I believed him.  No, he wasn't talking to me in person, but he was talking TO my person.  He had a simple message that we all seem to have forgotten, love thy neighbor.  He said if you love your neighbor, then you will start to love your community, then you start to love your town or city, your state, and on and on.  With that happening over and over there is no downside, only the opportunity for the world to be a better place.

Sorry, I got off track there a little bit.....  So back to the goodbye's and the phone call I got.  So My Mom said, "I need to let you know that the chemo is not working....  The Cancer is spreading and growing,,, and that the Doctor told her if there were things she wanted to do, she should probably go ahead and do them."

To say that this hit me hard is an understatement.  What is the deal?  What more does this woman have to endure?  As we talked, or tried to talk as both of us were crying so hard, I asked if the Doctor had given her a timeline.  She said no, and I brought up that commercial from the Cancer Center of America, where the woman asked for a second opinion and the Doctor tells her we don't have an expiration date on the bottom of our foot.  That was funny, because My Mom and Dad had already brought up that commercial and my Dad said her expiration date must have been
on her other foot, (from the leg that was amputated a few years back).

So one of the things that my Mom wanted to do was go see her Sister in Texas.  So they went.  And while they were down there I couldn't help but wonder how the visit was going.  How do you wrap all the things that you want to say to someone face to face in a couple of days, knowing that when you hug that person goodbye, it might be the last time you get that chance?  If you were in a situation like that would you be at peace knowing you treated that person with the love and respect that they deserved?  If the answer was no, how about you take some time to think about things, reevaluate, maybe forgive them, or offer forgiveness to them.  The world and your life would be a much better place if we all decided to do this...

Now,  if you will excuse me, I have to go say goodbye to my Mother...

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Plaid Shirts!!! NO, Striped Shirts!!  You're wrong, NO YOU"RE WRONG!!

Man, where do I start?  It has been so long since I posted an entry I almost had to have a password reminder sent so I could log in.

Today's entry may ruffle a few feathers, but I am getting pretty irritated with a lot of what I am seeing lately.  These are troubling times for our Nation.  In many facets of life, there are trying circumstances.  From the economy, to gun control, to the verdict in high profile court cases, how to hard boil eggs, the list goes on and on.  The reason I am so upset is that events and topics are being treated as an excuse to pick sides.  There is little debate, research, or examination happening, people and groups are just quickly picking sides and being very vocal to the "other" side as to how stupid and wrong they are.  Another thing that is troubling is people "deciding" on what they believe based on who feels this way or that.  If the "flavor of the day" entertainer/athlete/newscaster/etc. says that wearing denim is bad because of one reason or another there is a group of people that formulate their opinion based solely on this.  Not taking the time to 1, decide if this is something they need to concern themselves with in the first place, or 2, agree or disagree based on the celebrity or athlete's opinion, and 3, almost "forcing" the people around them to be with them or against them is exhausting.  As the great Ron Burgundy once said, "agree to disagree", then just move on...


I can remember a time when people were willing to have their own ideals and beliefs, AND were able to stand next to their Friends and Family that may have had opposing opinions on the same topics.  I want to say the word was,,,,, wait,,,, I almost have it,,, dang it what is that word???  Hold on, almost there,,,  OH YEA,,, RESPECT!!!  I honestly feel we have lost the capability to respect one another.  If someone is passionate about something that is fine, so long as they understand that not every other person is going to share their opinion.  I see far too many times a topic come up, and if the person I am speaking to doesn't agree with me, they become almost combative, and their opinion of me completely changes, their body language changes too, they become fidgety, and they no longer want to listen to a word I have to say.  And when I say picking sides, they now consider me their "enemy", and lump me into a group and assume that I now agree with all that said "group" thinks.  That is unfair.  I don't do that to them.  Out of respect...  You do nothing for anyone when you childishly mock the other person and become so defensive as to SHOW your disrespect openly.

Take the example of gun control.  Now this is a biggie, and is at the forefront of society right now.  I have my ideas about it, and remarkably they don't line up with either pro or con.  This is the hard thing for others to grasp.  Surely I am either pro-gun or anti-gun.  You have to be, come on hurry, pick a side!!!  Guess what, I don't have to!  Now I know what you are going to say, oh well, just ignore it all, run away, put your head in the sand and pretend it doesn't exist.  That is not the case at all.  Like I said, I am not picking sides.  I think there could be some changes, but picking one or the other is something I don't feel I need to do.  One side says do nothing, the other side says do everything, and I am not comfortable with either.  That being said, I do not treat the people I know and love differently based on where they stand, all I ask is they extend the same courtesy.

Other touchy ones are abortion, homosexuality, religions, dying your hair, gage-ing your ears, race relations, the way the toilet paper goes on the roll, the list goes on and on.  My stance is this, if I have no outward opinion about being pro-choice, or pro-life, it doesn't mean I am anti-abortion or pro-abortion, it means I feel it's none of my business.  If there is a person somewhere struggling with a decision, I really have no right to go stand in their face and tell them to do this or that.  I am not the person to judge them.  I find it kind of troubling that people point out what is or isn't allowed based on say, their religion.  Have faith, and understand that people will be judged by their God or Higher Power when that day comes.  Be happy in your life that you are making decisions to live your life in a way that supports your faith and morals, but understand that that other person is doing the same.  Rather than pointing out that they are different than you, realize that they are the same...

We are quickly turning into a land divided, and rather than trying to come to a point where we embrace our neighbor and work to make things better, we expend our energy in such a negative way trying to belittle those that dare to think differently.  It seems that the way people attempt to make themselves feel better, or feel relevant, is to tear others down.  That is just sad...

I guess what I am trying to get to is this.  How about we get back to respecting each other again.  Trying to treat everyone the way we want to be treated.  Sure things may still suck, but they will suck less knowing we are all together, not alone..  If you can go to bed at night knowing you did your part to make life as good for yourself and others, good on you.  But if you lie there at night realizing that you were mean to others, and decide it's because they aren't exactly like you, understand that only one person can change that.....

Peace,

Woody

Revelations

Ok, here's the deal, boys and girls are different.  I know, this isn't news to anyone, but I am in the middle of this discovery and it is mind-bottling! 

Kim and I were watching an episode of Duck Dynasty last night.  For those of you that haven't seen the show, it is about a family that has made quite a living off of making duck calls.  I recommend the show as it is very entertaining.

Anywho, this episode pertained to the 14 year old daughter of Willie, the CEO of the duck call company.  Seems she is going to her first dance, with her BOYFRIEND, that she has apparently had for 2 or 3 months without her Daddy's knowledge.  The episode goes on with the Father and Uncle taking the new boyfriend out into the woods snake hunting, while Grandad and the Great Uncle taking the 14 year old out to "talk".  Both outings are centered on educating the youngsters on respect for each other, and doing the right things.  Uncle Jase says to Willie at one point to tell Beau (the boyfriend) that "Hands to hands, lips to lips, anything else waits until marriage."  Beau is very nervous, as any 14 year old boy should be when in the woods with the Father of the girl he is dating, snakes, and loaded weapons.  While the girl is turning the questioning back on her Grandfather.  He asked her how long she made Beau wait to kiss her, she responded by asking him how long Miss Kay made him wait to kiss her.  The answer was not long in both cases.

As we watched, Kim made some keen observations.  One was how she wished boys could somehow be Fathers first, then boys.  This would let them see how precious little girls are, and they would treat them accordingly.  Then she commented on how the women in the family were very supportive of the whole relationship.  I countered that this was because women have a very selective memory.  Women have the uncanny ability to remember innate details about many things throughout a relationship, and they use this information to hold their men over a barrel.  At the same time they seem to forget other things or events.  For instance, we were watching the show and the women were all like "It's so sweet," blah, blah, bleech.  Not once thinking about all the nights in the balconies at the movies when the guys were trying to feel around for more than popcorn, wink wink, nudge nudge.  My other example was childbirth, how many times have you heard of women in the midst of a 10 hour labor, saying things like "You are never allowed to touch me EVER again", or "You did this to me you *&$#@!"  And a year later they are pregnant again and full of joy with that healthy glow....

I raised 2 boys, very different from being part of a 13 year old girls up-bringing.  I am lost.  I don't know what to do, I don't know what to say, I don't know if I should interject into conversations or not.  I DO know that a lot of what I say or do is not seen or heard, either on purpose or not, and I also know that I am hyper-sensitive to the actions and reactions of this ominous teenage force.

Another thing we noticed was how it truly takes a village to raise and shape a child.  What we struggle with is having our Daughter around people and situations that shape her in a positive manner.  Because believe me, there are plenty of negative influences around.  The issue is she doesn't see it that way, and that is tough.

Taylor Swift sings a song called "Fifteen", where she says "when your fifteen and somebody tells you they love you, you're gonna believe them."  As a parent you battle with them trying to make them understand that because they don't have the life experiences they need to be careful.  They may feel like this is IT, and in their minds it is.  But pitfalls lie around every corner.  Boys are Prince Charming one day, and jerks the next.  It is the same now as it always has been, but when you are on the parent side, it is brutal and painful in a way I can't explain.  You want to tell her I told you so, and you want to go find the boy and rip his heart out through his throat and look in his eye as you explain to him that is what he just did you your precious baby.  But you can't do either because who knows, the jerk might just be Prince Charming again tomorrow...

Happy New Year??

*Not an actual picture of Joey's insides.

Ok, Here's the Deal.....

Every year since I started working with my current employer, I have taken the week between Christmas and New Years off.  The time always goes way too fast, and it seems I only get a fraction of the things I would like to get done, actually done.

This years break was no exception.  Leading up to my time off Kim and I had grand plans of getting pictures and artwork hung on the walls of our home.  Kim and Keara decided to paint my office,

Office after Paint!

the kitchen faucet needed replaced, the list went on and on.  We actually got all but the hanging of stuff done.  We even put shelving up and Kim alphabetized all the DVD's so we can actually see and watch them when we want to.  I got the faucet replaced,

New faucet and soap dispenser.

and made a jewelry hanger and hung it for Kim.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Kim's Jewelry Hanger Thingy.

  So all was going well, and then came the last day of my break, New Years Day.  It was a good day for the most part.  Joey and Lauren came over with their new addition, a puppy named Boo.  Corey somehow had the day off work, we got a stack of pizzas, and sat down to watch the Bronco game.  The game stunk, but the company was good.  After the game, Joey and Lauren went home, I got all my stuff ready for the return to work and settled in for a bit of down time before going to bed.  Then I got a text from Joey.  He said he thought something was going on with his appendix.  He waited it out, then called the nurse hot line.  They told him to head into the ER, he called me around midnight, Corey and I met them at the hospital.
So long story short, after a scan it was decided he needed an appendectomy.  Surgery was the next morning.
As I write this, Joey is at home resting, dealing with the aftermath.  What aftermath you ask, well poor guy, the timing could not have been worse.  He had surgery the day before he was to stat what Corey called his "first grown-up job."   See Joey got a long term sub job at the high school he student taught at.  Now they had to get a sub for the sub they got!  In addition, he was supposed to travel to California for a coaching clinic.  He had to cancel the trip, and that really stinks for him.

Oh well, the year can only go up for Joey, it could start heading that direction if the Broncos can find a way to beat the Steelers this Sunday.......

Peace,

Woody

I now know my limitations...

Hello Followers!

I am just checking in, wanted to let you know I came to another realization in my life, I no longer feel I can play for the Denver Broncos.

I know, it's sad but true.  There was a time after the last snap I participated in in college, that I felt I could run with the big boys.  I know it was probably not realistic, and filled with false bravado, but I honestly thought I could hang, and wanted to be there blocking for the legend John Elway.  Then a few more years passed, and I was confident I could still contribute.  Until Sunday, I held onto to the dream that I could be the go-to long snapper.  I wouldn't have to do much, just make sure the Field Goal holder and the Punter got the ball quickly and with accuracy.  I would gladly do it for the league minimum.

So what changed?  Well, I realized when returning to my seat after going potty and getting a large order of Supreme Nachos and a Coke.  There I was walking up the stairs to my seat.  On the fist level, seriously, like 20 steps, and I was out of breath, and my knee and back hurt so bad I was seeing stars.  I realized that I wouldn't  survive the jog from the huddle to the line of scrimmage.

Oh well, maybe I can be a DH for the Rockies if they ever go to AL rules.....  Oh wait, I sucked at Baseball.

Peace,

Woody

Wishes

I shared a story on my Facebook wall yesterday, if any of you saw it, I am sorry for the duplication here.  For those of you that did not see it, it was about a couple in Iowa that had been married for 72 years.  They were in a car accident, and were both placed in ICU, together.  The gentleman died holding the hand of the one he loved more than anything in the world.  With their family surrounding them, they noticed that although he had stopped breathing, his heart rate monitor was still registering a heartbeat.  The medical staff said it was the wife’s heartbeat pulsing through her husband’s body.  One hour after the man died, she crossed over to be with him.  The story said they continued to hold hands through the funeral service.

This story touched me at many different levels, to my core.  I am blessed to have a partner that I want to live the rest of my life with, and can’t be without.  After reading the story I was reminded of the movie “The Notebook”.  If you haven’t seen the movie, the closing scene is one which the husband curls up in his wife’s bed in the nursing home, and both of them pass away in their sleep holding one another.

Kim and I have only been married for a little over a year, but we have had many discussions about what we want the end of our lives to be like, and given the choice, we would like to cross over to heaven together.  Although that would seem tragic and would create quite a loss for our family, it is the ending we would prefer.

I look at my parents, and as cruel and heartless as it may sound, I would ask God to take both of them at the same time.  I hope when my Mother reads this she understands what I mean.  They have been together over 50 years, and it is plain to see how much they love and care for one another.  I worry about either one of them being without the other.  I would like them both to know I would be okay while they waited for me in Heaven.

I wish everyone could feel the way I do about Kim, the way my parents feel about each other.  The way Elsa felt about Nick, Mary about Bob, the list goes on and on.  The world would be a much better place.

So if our kids ask, Kim and I want to go together, donate our bodies to science, when they are done poking and prodding, cremate us, mix our ashes together, and sprinkle them on the beach at Chatfield where we were married.  Keep track of everything that day, if it is windy, raining, snowing whatever.  Remember how the day smells, yes, how it smells.  If it is the smell of a crisp winter day or the smell of the leaves in fall, remember it…..  That way, in the years that follow, when you are outside and the wind blows the leaves around and your nose catches that aroma, you will know it is us letting you know we got where we were going and want to say hello.

Just Checking In

Dear Followers,

I know that I haven't posted in a long time.  Sorry, I promise to post more in the future.

I was going to leave it at that, but thought I should write a bit more.  Not sure why I haven't posted in so long, it isn't that I have been super busy or anything,  just haven't had much to share.

As far as good anecdotes, my life seems to be full of them, and I will continue to document them as I see fit....  It could be the loss of another loved one has kept me from being here, it is hard to be humorous when you lose someone, I never want to half-ass it you know. 

Maybe the reason I haven't posted is it is football season and I have been watching the Broncos half-ass it.  Yea that could be it....

Just know I am still here, and will try to post more frequently in the future..

Peace,
Woody