Dreams

I had another weird dream last night.  I say another, because I seem to have freaky weird dreams all the time.  This one was vivid, and I think the reason I remember it so well is because it involves something from my childhood.

I grew up in Aurora, Colorado, in an area called Hoffman Heights.  We had a burger joint called Burger Chef.  I loved this place, it was awesome, and on rare occasions I got to eat there.  My memories of this place are very distant and foggy, but I remember I loved it.

Burger Chef was in a strip mall, next to a Winchell's Donuts, and across from a Woolco, and an old Woolworths store.  There was a Taco place around the corner that I think was named Taco Johns, but it wasn't associated with the Taco John's chain of today.  All the previously mentioned places are gone now, which reminds me how old I am.




 

Anywho, my dream was funky, because the surroundings kept changing, like they do in dreams, but there was one constant.  The Burger Chef from my childhood had a little shop, and I was so happy.  I remember in my dream that it was closed, but they had drawers with hamburgers and fries that you could take.  I remember buying a bunch, and I couldn't wait to find my friend Mike.  See Mike is from the Cleveland.Ohio area, and he is one of the few people I have found that remembers the Burger Chef chain.  So I found him in my dream, and we sat and ate Burger Chef, then I woke up, and I was disappointed, like when you dream you won the lottery, and then wake to empty pockets.



I love how the mind works, I can tell you that I haven't spoken of, nor heard about Burger Chef in many years.  I like how childhood memories sneak back into the present.  Sometimes it is a smell that takes you to a specific time and place, sometimes it's a song.  But dreams are even cooler, because there is no way to direct the dream one way or another.  The thoughts and events happen all on their own.  This is a great feeling, and lends itself to conscious thoughts and memories when you are awake.

Like remembering the sweet blue and white striped shorts I got at Woolco, how the girls resisted be is beyond comprehension......

 All this, and I didn't even eat Taco Bell before I went to bed.

Peace,
Woody

I'm Back

Hello there,

It's me again, just thought I would drop by and post another entry for my faithful followers.  Hope everyone's 2011 is going good.  I chose to say the year as Two-Thousand-Eleven.  No Twenty-Eleven here, just my personal feeling.

Which brings me to another thing, how do you say the word for the little sheets of paper you clip from the Sunday paper to save 40 cents on Charmin or a buck off Little Juan Frozen Burritos?
This is a point of contention in my house, because my wife says the word coupon as (que-pon), I say it as (coo-pon).  Now I am sure there are "rules" and all, like a bossy vowel or consanant making another letter sound wierd, why cant they all just get along and be themselves?

This is always a fun topic in a crowd because the pronunciation is split, and I can usually sway a few people over to the right side, oops, I mean MY side by asking them what you call an older woman who likes to date young men.  You sure don't call her a "que-grr" now do you?

Thoughts?

Peace,
Woody

Head Nods

Random Mall Crowd

I have a theory, and I want to share it with you.  This is information I have gathered over the course of my lifetime, and I want you to seriously ponder it.  What I am about to tell you is completely based on the male species, and I am not convinced it is unique to humans.

My observation is this, men have a silent greeting that involves a head nod.  If you are somewhere in a crowd, you will notice men nodding to each other in what I classify as 1 of 2 ways based on if they know each other or not.

I really screwed up, because I could have no doubt received a multimillion dollar grant from the government to research and divulge this info..... Oh well my loss.

The first head nod is for males that do not know one another.  The motion is downward, and the silent message is simply hello.  Eyes meet, and the downward nod is instituted saying "hello there sir, pass and go in peace".  This is usually a quick nod as neither male wants to give the subversive message that the other one is the alpha-male.  *IMPORTANT NOTE* Please do not confuse this action with the dangerous movement I will call the "Bad Guy Nod".  You have seen this in a lot of movies the likes of Jason Bourne, and on TV shows like 24.  The "Bad Guy Nod" is a much more deliberate and slow movement between 2 individuals that are up to no good.  They will not lose eye contact during the slow nod, and usually 1 of the men is in a stationary position.  This nod conveys the message "Alpha-Plan X is in effect, do not abort".


The second nod is for guys who know each other, either quite well, or even just casually.  This movement is a quick nod upward, and there is no loss of eye contact.  This is much more casual, and can lead to a conversation, or a simple "Hey, hows it going", but vocalization is not a requirement.  One variation to this can be seen in bars, coffee shops, etc., where a customer is trying to get the attention of the bartender or clerk.  This is one of the few times an upward head nod is used between people who do not know each other.  The upward nod is a good indicator when you are out that you have met this person before in some capacity.

An errant upward head nod will leave the receiving male obsessing "Where do I know that guy from", it is yet another way to drive someone crazy.  They will sit bolt upright in bed at 3 in the morning saying "I know, I saw him at the gym", then realize they don't belong to a gym, and keep them from sleeping the rest of the night.  I would say try it on your friends, but they know you so the parts of the equation don't work.  You can, however, as you are passing an acquaintance, give him the "Non-Bad-Guy" downward nod, and leave him wondering, "Man did I do something to make Harvey mad?  He acted like he didn't even recognize me".

Just ways to mess with people and keep them guessing.

Try it out next time you are at the mall, you know when you are hanging out waiting for your significant other to get out of Bath and Body Works or Sports Authority respectively.  You can observer 2 males pass and say, hey those guys know each other, or quickly determine they had never seen each other before.  Just be leery of the "Bad-Guy-Nod", especially if one of them is stationary, nothing good could come of that.  Although, if you are standing still waiting for someone and downward nod,,,,,,,,  I'm just sayin'.

Peace,
Woody

New Dodge - RAM Tough!

Okay, here's the deal, I know that the knowledge I am about to drop on you isn't new, but apparently it still is a foreign concept to some people.  A 4 wheel drive vehicle, is not, I repeat NOT, a 4 wheel STOP vehicle.


It snowed here most of yesterday, overnight, and was snowing for the commute to work this morning.  This meant the roads were icy and snow-packed.  you can't see the lines to determine what lane you are in, so if there is more than 2 you do the best you can.  You follow,(Unless it spins out and goes in the ditch), the vehicle in front of you from a safe distance. Usually you can see ruts in the snow-packed road to help guide you.  It is recommended you leave yourself a little extra time, as the posted speed limit is not attainable in these treacherous conditions. 

So there I was, just going with the flow when it happened!  I saw the next great thing from the auto industry, the Dodge Ram 1500 / any speed in any conditions pickup truck!  This truck must be awesome, because it can apparently go 75 MPH in conditions that my poor little CR-V (and all the other vehicles on the road) can't.  It was also equipped with headlights that flashed from high-beam off and on, and off and on as it approached vehicles that were apparently in it's way.  This is handy, so you can get out of this special trucks way and admire the new technology that lets it glide through any hazzard, carrying the driver to their destination without a worry.

But seriously, what goes through the mind of someone that drives like that?  It is very easy to go fast in icy, snowy conditions, but stopping is a another matter.  Slow down folks.

I gave the guy the thumb of Karma, something I created that is a little less offensive as the 1 finger salute, and let him go by me, secretly hoping he would fishtail, slide around, miss all the other cars and end up in the ditch.  I didn't wish for the driver to injure himself, but if he soiled himself that would be just fine.







Be safe people.

Peace,
Woody

Hear Me Now, But Belieeeeve Me Latuh!!!!

Who remembers the SNL skit Hanz and Franz?  Well, I am back at it.  For those of you that have known me for a while, you know that I am a bit large for my size.  "I swallow a lot of aggression,  along with a lot of pizzas, ha ha PIZZAS!!" (I miss John Candy).  I have yo-yo'ed quite a bit over the last decade or so, did a pretty good job last year until my honeymoon (damn those cruise ship buffet lines!), but since then gained about half what I lost back.  So with the new year comes a new resolve to get back to the gym.  It's not a "new" resolution, as I have been a regular in the gym for quite a while, it is the regularity that slowed down.  I am guilty of using any excuse not to go to the gym, "I need to go to the bank", "I have to run this errand", "It's Tuesday", you get the idea.

Me Close to my Heaviest , at Corey's Graduation.

I always look for encouragement, and this time I found a blog named "www.bendoeslife.com" that has been interesting to read.  I recommend you take a look, his journey has been intense and inspirational.  So I will periodically be giving you all (again, my 2 followers) updates, as Ben says going public makes you more accountable.  Now Ben is a runner, not me, I only run if someone is chasing me, so I have been the guy on the stationary bike or elliptical.  I feel bad for the machines, they didn't do anything, and then this behemoth jumps on and starts going crazy.  The girl that takes care of the gym here at work comes out and oils the machines when I am using them, I think oil is futile, the machines aren't squeaking, they are SCREAMING!!

High School Senior 1986

High School Football

I was in shape in high school, got a football scholarship, we had a healthy (meaning large and calorie filled) training table to eat from.  I hurt my knee that first year, and that was it for my playing days, but I kept eating like I was still playing.  That has always been my downfall.  I am addicted to food, I really like it, and what sucks is unlike addictions to other substances such as alcohol or drugs, food is a necessity.  I try hard to control what I eat, and that is the struggle, but I will figure it out.  Don't get me wrong, I am still in shape, it's just the shape of a pear!  I am out to bury the stereotype, I was the jock, football capitan, that is now the fat guy, but I can change that.  I will keep you posted.

On My Bike, Thinner times around 2004.

Me Christmas 2010, going for the Homeless look.

So if you have words of encouragement, I will take them, I need all the help I can get.

Peace,
Woody

"You are MEAN"

Wow, 2011 already?  So it starts, how long will it take me to actually write 2011, instead of writing 2010 and crossing it out?  Only time will tell, hopefully it wont take long.

I hope all my followers (all 2 of you), had a great holiday season, I did, with the exception of a bout of the stomach flu, yuck!

Spent some time with family, exchanging gifts and what not.  It was great, especially the gift "Santa" brought my Mom.  See coming up on 2 years ago, my Mom, bless her heart, went into the hospital for a routine check of why her foot hurt.  Long story short, her leg was amputated.  Now this would clobber other people, but Mom took it in stride (pun intended), and hasn't slowed down yet.
So imagine her surprise (she wasn't) when she opened a package that contained the above bobble-head of the Leg Lamp from "A Christmas Story".
See my family is a little weird, (quite possibly the understatement of the year 3 days in), and have used kidding and laughter to combat a great deal of my Mom losing her leg.  For example, my Dad wants her to go apply at IHOP (ba-dum-bump), and I suggested we call her Char-leans, instead of Charlene....... (chirp, chirp)

I guess the lesson in all of this is if you are faced with challenges, face them back and let them know who's boss.  My Mom is a shining example of this, and it is another reason why she is one of my heroes.

By the way, she used her new gift as the centerpiece of the table, not sure who got it for her,,,,  but if you need to know where you can pick up various leg lamp items, I can help you out.  I heard that the cashier where this item was purchased said "This is cute", then when told the story, laughed very hard, caught herself and scolded me, I mean the person who bought it, and said "You are MEAN"!

I am so MEAN I hope my Mom knows how much I love her..  Happy 2011

Peace,
Woody